You never know how much you appreciate and enjoy being with someone until they go away. Well, let me tell you the story my husband went out of town, and let me tell you it sucked. I honestly felt like man now I get to watch what I want and just be lazy. But in all honesty, I was lonely. The first day was okay, but the second day I was used to having someone to laugh and joke with. I was used to having someone to hang out with. Yes, I have friends but hanging with my husband is so much fun. When I say that my husband is my best friend he really is. We just get each other and it’s never a dull moment. To say that I was counting down the days and hours for his return would be an understatement. I was so happy when he came back from out of town. It made me appreciate the time that we spent more and just having someone who cares about me. Yes, I have friends but it’s nothing like having your man around. I feel like when you’re around someone all the time you don’t truly appreciate them until they are gone. Marriage is like that you don’t appreciate your marriage until you know longer have one. The moral of the story is to enjoy who you are with because one day you won’t have them.
My journey to peace and joy:
Good Sunday morning everyone. I want to talk to you all about peace and joy. I had been going through some things for about 4 years now. And people would have thought that I had peace and joy but I didn’t. It’s so easy to fake and hide how you feel from other people. I’ve always been good at masking my feelings, but something had to give and quickly. I started going to counseling to deal with my feelings and what was going on. That helped me so much at the time. She gave me tools to help me and I’m at a place that I never thought that I would be at. I had to take some hard looks at my life and who was in my life. Was I okay with how things were going? Why did I put up with certain things? Just because we are friends and family doesn’t mean you can treat me a certain way. There were so many things that I had to figure out and it wouldn’t be overnight. But once you start putting in the work for yourself you start to see changes. And you can’t give up or give in either. You have to stick to your plan because you have to understand you are just as important as anyone else. I didn’t value myself or even love myself like I thought I did. I was so busy making sure others were okay and had what they needed from me, that I didn’t even give myself what I needed. Fast forward to now. When I smile it’s genuine. When I laugh it’s from the heart and sincere. When I tell you that I have worked so hard to get to where I am and I refuse to let anyone take that from me. My peace and joy took me a long time to find and I have found them. I’m still not done doing the work myself but the results so far are amazing. I have read so many blogs, Instagram posts, and Facebook posts about people wanting to make a change and how it’s hard. Yes, it’s going to be hard but you have to start somewhere if you want to change your life. No one is going to do the work for you. You have to commit to doing better for yourself. When will you put yourself first? When will you change? Listen if this is you start today. Start by journaling your feelings. Start by asking yourself the hard questions. Start by googling books that can help you with what you’re going through. Start by looking for a therapist if that’s what you need. But the main thing is to start somewhere. Don’t give up on yourself or put yourself to the side. You wouldn’t do that for anyone else so why would you do that to yourself? Peace and joy take time but when you find it you will know that it was worth putting in the work.
When I tell you that my 40’s have my eyes WIDE open. Chile you can’t tell me anything. When I tell you that I’m sticking to my boundaries and I’m creating a space for me to thrive. Well, that’s exactly what I’m doing. Honey, I don’t know why it took me so long to get here. Hold up yes I do, because I’m kind, caring and always put others’ needs before my own. Well not no more, well within limits I should say. I’m not that heartless and cold. Who is this new woman? I love me some her. I have been through storms and valleys, and when I tell you that I see the rainbow. I see the rainbow and I’m going to be alright. It’s been hard and I shed so many tears. But why keep crying about things that I can change? Happiness hello it’s me and I’m here to stay. Joy girl where have you been, I’m here to stay. Patience chile it’s been a long time and I’m here to stay. Confidence well we ain’t never been friends, but you’re my new BFF. This journey is just being and I have tons left to do to be where I want to be. I’m not giving up and I definitely won’t be looking back.
It get’s greater later:
I have heard the saying that it gets greater later. Well, I’m here to tell you that that is the truth. I use to be in some pretty unhealthy relationships and when I started working on myself and not worrying about being in the next relationship that is when I found who God had for me. I remember one day after church a friend of mine was talking to me about writing down everything that she was looking for in a man. I was like I’m going to have to try that because what I’m doing isn’t working at all for me. So I wrote down what I wanted in a man. And I forgot all about that paper until I met my husband. God gave me what I needed and wanted in one person. As I’m going through a new transition in life my jobs have always been in the medical field, legal field, or just administration field. And the money was great and the experience was great but I felt like I needed more and to be honest deserve more. It feels like no matter how hard you work no one notices the person doing more than others. Others can do enough to get by or enough to always ask for help. I’ve been discouraged about the job search. I’m very picky either it was too far, overqualified, or just wasn’t interested in the job. So I went on a job interview last week and the job interview was amazing. But there was one catch to it and that made me not want to take the job because of my lack in one area. Well, let me tell you the lady who interviewed me said that I was a diamond in the rough and that she didn’t mean to scare me off about this one particular part of the job. She wanted me and told the staffing agency that. Let me just say this I needed to get out of my comfort zone. It’s a little farther than I would have liked to go, but it’s time for me to step out and stop letting things interfere with what God has for me. Not only do I have a new job that I start on Monday, but also new pay. So yes it does get greater later. If you have been with me since the beginning you know that I share my life and I keep it 100% real on here. My journey will not look like yours but one thing about a journey you will always learn something from it.
Good morning beautiful people. How many times have you said something positive to yourself in the morning? How many times do you say something positive to yourself period? Let’s get in the habit of speaking positive words to ourselves. We need it as much as anyone else does. So today I challenge you to speak great things to yourself. Have a great day.
Learning to have more joy:
I have heard a lot about joy. And I have talked to people who said that joy is more important to them than happiness. And as I thought about what they said. I started to really wonder about joy. Happiness comes and goes but joy is something that is with you always. And as this year is about me and working on me I needed to truly understand the joy and who to have joy. I have been learning some important lessons about joy and just being a better me. I can say that happiness is not a problem. But joy, I’m learning to have it. And so far it’s a lesson. Joy doesn’t come easy it’s something that has to be practiced. And I’m on the road to having more joy in my life. So do you have joy? What have you done to get and keep it in your life?
As I count down to my birthday (which is Sunday). I have noticed how much peace that I have. I’m enjoying life more and taking time for the little things. I have noticed that I enjoy conversations with those with whom I’m close. I have learned to not take things so personally. My life is what I make it. And I want nothing but peace and love around me. As I’m reflecting on life and what happened in my past I’m trying hard not to repeat those same mistakes. I have heard the saying “Create the life you want to live”. I’m trying to do just that.
I don’t know about you but I’m so tired of seeing negativity on the news and in the world. It has taken a toll on my mental health. That’s why I wanted to do something different today. What makes you happy? Is it a book your reading, a tv show your watching, a new recipe you learned how to make? What is making you happy right now? I’ll go first and I will say that starting physical therapy on my rotator cuff and the fact that it is going to rain today. Yes, I love the rain. So what is your happiness looking like? I would love to know.