Realization:

Going back home taught me lessons and showed me blessings. I didn’t know what to feel when I get back home. It hurt losing my great uncle. But I didn’t know realized the void that I felt. The hurt is massive but I just felt lost without him. He was a big part of my life. But when you mix in grief and family well that combination isn’t always the best. You see the worst in people come out. People forget that we are here to celebrate life and not fight over things! People start talking about one another like we are not family. I felt so many emotions while being home but most of my emotions were hurt. Being home showed me why my circle is so small. It also showed me who cares about me. So many times we talk about what was and not what is. Sadly, death can bring more than just the pain of losing someone. It can bring the realization that the people you care about the most don’t care about you as much as you thought. Sadly, it took someone’s death for me to realize this.

Family:

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Last weekend I went home to see my family. It has been two since I have been back home. It was good to see family and friends, but being home reminds me of the person that I use to be and don’t want to be anymore. The memories of all that I have been through and what it took to overcome so many things came back to my mind. But more importantly, it reminded me of how strong I am and how I can overcome anything. This weekend was full of laughs and love. To see my mom and kids again was everything. To be able to hug my grandparents and great uncle was the best. But for me seeing people that I didn’t get along with and who broke me down. But being able to hold my head up and still smile was wonderful. They say home is where the heart is, but I feel like home will always be with you no matter where you are. This weekend has shown me that I miss my family, my sister, and my brother. I miss being with them. But I see my mom and kids often, but I miss having everyone together at the same time. I need to make more time for my family.

Take time:

I’m grateful for this time to reflect and spend time with my family. One thing that I notice is that we are so busy doing this and doing that, that we don’t make time for each other as we should. So slowing down has made us appreciate the time that we have together. Not only that but it has helped us to open up about how we feel, what we can work on and just reflect on what is important. I think that when things go back to normal that we are not going to neglect ourselves or each other. We are going to be more intentional about spending time as a family. There are so many things that we can learn in this season, but to me, the most important is to love and spend time with people who matter the most to you. Make this season worth more than complaining. Let’s connect with the ones that we love.

About yesterday:

Yesterday was truly amazing, to be honest. I didn’t realize how much fun I had with my husband and daughter. I got to hang out with my baby girl and watch our show on Netflix and just talk. Spending time with her is so important because she’s about to enter into a new season this year. College student. Even though she may not have graduation she’s going to college. Just hanging with her and her wanting to hang with me I love it. And of course the hubby I love spending time with him, even when he gets on my nerves. But yesterday was just so peaceful and we were all laughing and just being silly. I know this is a stressful time for everyone but we all have to make the most of it. Spend one on one time with everyone, I’m truly cherishing this moment because like I said my daughter will be in college soon. The hubby and I are going to be empty nesters so make the most of your time with the people that you love. The little things truly matter most.

My baby sister:

I have a small circle who I can talk to about anything. I’m the only child that my mom has but I’m the second child that my dad has out of four. Growing up I was super close to my older sister, but when I was 16 I got to send the summer with my dad. That was the highlight of my childhood. But the best part was spending time with my baby sister and brother. We had a bond that was like best friends. Over the years I could call on my baby sister to laugh, get things off my chest and just to catch you. My baby sister and I haven’t talked like we use to in a while and it made me sad. But we are grown and have different things going on in our life. But during the last couple of months, my sister and I have been talking and just catching up. I needed to hear her voice, her support, and just her love. When you have people in your life who are extremely important don’t take them for granted. I love my baby sister with all that is within me.

Enjoy today:

There is nothing like family. If I could I would have all my family here with me today. But that’s not possible. So I will make the most of who is here with me. One thing about me is that I love my family. My family has my heart. We take for granted how much we need our families. Coming home to family is everything to me. Even though they get on my nerves at times, I wouldn’t trade them for the world. So today let’s take the time to enjoy your family. Tomorrow is not promised so make the most of the time that you have now. I hope you enjoy your family today. Make new memories and don’t forget to tell them that you love them.