Happy Friday:

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I don’t know about you but I’m so tired of seeing negativity on the news and in the world. It has taken a toll on my mental health. That’s why I wanted to do something different today. What makes you happy? Is it a book your reading, a tv show your watching, a new recipe you learned how to make? What is making you happy right now? I’ll go first and I will say that starting physical therapy on my rotator cuff and the fact that it is going to rain today. Yes, I love the rain. So what is your happiness looking like? I would love to know.

So now what?:

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So now what? So Derek Chauvin is guilty on all three counts so now what? I know that the family of George Floyd is happy with the verdict, but what now? Do I feel like the killings will stop? No, I don’t. Do I still worry about my family? Yes, I do. No one can truly understand how you have to pray for your family every time they leave the house. I don’t think anyone should have to die at the hands of the police or anyone else. But right now where do we go from here as a country? Is this just the beginning or is this just a one-time thing? Will I still have to fear leaving my home? At some point, we need to stop seeing skin color as a threat. As much as I wanted to see a guilty verdict I want to be seen as human. My heart is overwhelmed with so many unnecessary killings. How many times will we have to grieve? How many times do we need to defend our skin color? When will we start being treated like we are human and matter?

One day at a time:

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Trying to learn how to walk by faith and not by sight. It’s hard to have faith when things are not working out the way that you had hoped or planned. It’s hard to see the light at the end of the tunnel. I know that I’m going through something and that it will all work out in the end. But sometimes it’s hard to see or even understand it when you are going through it. I know that there are lessons in each trial that we go through but sometimes I question why it has to happen. I’m starting to question whether or not I was selfish this year but just taking the time to get me together. Maybe I should have been more focused on my family. Maybe I don’t need the time that I think that I do. Who knows what the right answer is right now. But I can only take it one day at a time.

Trying to be content:

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Sometimes it is hard to be content when things are not going the way you thought they would go. But right now I’m trying to be content with how my life is going. I have a rotator cuff injury and I’m looking for a job. This is not where I saw my life, well because I had it all planned out. But trust me just because you plan something doesn’t mean that it was going to go your way. I’m trying to learn how to just let go and things will work out. But it’s hard when you want your shoulder to be better and be able to find an amazing job. I’m not a patient person and I need to learn to be patient and know that things will work out.

It’s okay:

I know that everyone deals with things differently. I’m being hard on myself regarding my book. It’s not going to write itself. But right now I just don’t want to work on it. My dream is to become a published author. But right now my mind and heart is not in it. I know it will get completed one day and to not be hard on myself. As long as the passion to write is still there then I know that my book will get completed.

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Husband Appreciation Day

Today is husband appreciation day. Well I don’t need a day to appreciate my husband. I appreciate him everyday. My husband is my protector, my best friend, my secret keeper and so much more. Wives I know that marriage can get rough and we may feel like it’s all about us. But take a minute and think about all the things you’re husband deals with daily. They do things for us that are seen and unseen. My husband doesn’t ask for much but if I could I would give him the world and more. So ladies let’s take more time out to truly appreciate the men in your lives.

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Life:

It’s time to reset and refocus my life. I haven’t felt like writing in awhile. With so much going on it’s not the same. Went to the doctor today because my shoulder has been bothering me. Only to find out it’s my rotator cup. I have to do physical therapy and if it doesn’t get better than surgery. So much has been going on with my life that I need a time out button. But it’s time to reset and refocus. I have got to get me back on track.

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Thank you:

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As you may have noticed that I haven’t been blogging in a while. Life has been happening. I’ve been taking time to journal and just be in my thoughts. I noticed that I have to step away for a while to make sense of things and in doing so I can get more clarity. There has been so much going on in this country as well. I just needed a breather. Thank you to everyone who has been concerned and checking on me. I’m fine just needed a minute to get me together.

Book review:

Whoa, what can I say about this book. I was expecting so much detail about her life and the things that had happened to her. I truly enjoyed this book. I love the fact that she was raw and honest in this book. This book made me laugh and at times brought me to tears. This book was worth the hype and so much more.