Hold on:

Hold on to your love

Let go of your hate

Let your light shine

No more debate

Where is your smile

Your laughter too

Hold on girl God has you

No matter what you will always be loved

God has you don’t worry about man

Hold your head up

And always smile

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Feelings:

You have to understand I feel less than

The words that you spewed it’s hard to comprehend

I feel like hiding all my pain away

Do you see me or am I a cast away

I have feelings trust me I do

My feelings hurt just like you

I don’t run I sure don’t hide

My feelings are real the pain I hide

Do you understand what I’m going through

Trust me you don’t I’m not like you

The sun will shine:

I hide behind the shadows

And the image of me

Hoping that you can’t see the pain that I see

Gone is my laughter

Gone is my smile

It hasn’t come back in quite awhile

The reflection of me is more that I can bare

My sadness I don’t want to share

Where have I gone

Where could I be

Living beneath the shadows is where you will find me

My hope is lost no more to gain

The tears that you see only reflect my pain

My reflection of me is staring right back

Your pain will end your hope will not lack

Lift up your head and put on a smile

Pain may come but joy last for awhile

Come on back to love and laughter

Don’t look back there’s nothing to go after

Count your blessings not your pain

The sun will shine after the rain

No longer:

No longer do I wonder

If you’re there for me

You defined the odds

That no one can see

You changed for me

Or maybe it was for you

My dreams are yours too

How do we become so in love

It’s not just a word maybe it’s a drug

When I’m down you lifted me up

Not able to trust

No it must be luck

Lack no more

I’m stronger now

No more heart on my sleeve

I’m stronger now

I’m able to love no more lack

My trust is stronger

I’m back

I don’t understand:

For the love of Pete. Whoever Pete is. Why do I find myself dealing with the same crap???? I don’t understand if you have explained how something makes you feel to someone and they intentionally do it again? I’m a very laid back person. But this situation has me really ready to go the fuck off!!! I don’t understand how people can raise children who become adults who are disrespectful and don’t care. How many times will people make it okay for them to do wrong? If you don’t correct something now what happens when they go to jail? What happens when they disrespect there parents? Sorry I’m ranting but you get tired of disrespectful people.

Can you help me:

Have you ever spoken those words? Can you help me? And have you ever been disappointed because there was so many excuses? Like why didn’t you remind me, oh I didn’t know you meant now, etc. But have you ever been all in for someone else? Yeah I’m disappointed. This is one of my issues. That when I need help I don’t ask. I’m not talking about money or anything like that. I know I’m a work in progress and this has set me back all the way. I’m very disappointed. People just don’t value you like you value them. Hard lesson learned.

For me:

Are you for me or against me?

Do you care or just want to play with my emotions?

When you look at me do you see someone who is worth your time?

Are you for me or against me?

Do you love me or hate me?

Do you need me or want to use me?

Am I worth your time or just a waste?

Are you for me?

That’s the question

Letter to younger self:

Dear Me:

You are loved more than you realize. All that your going through now is going to make you stronger. Trust me trouble don’t last always. Keep your head up. Don’t be so quick to trust everyone. Everyone is not your friend and don’t have your best interest at heart. Keep smiling and doing your best. Don’t let people dim your shine. Don’t become distracted with things that don’t concern you. Let adults work out there own issues and understand that it’s not your fault. Relationships will come and go. Don’t worry because real love will come your way. Never let anyone pressure you into sex or anything else. Trust your gut always. Never give up on your dreams for someone else. Know that your going to make some really good and loyal friends. Every obstacle is a lesson to learn and grow. I love you and your going to be great.

Lies:

I have an issue with people who lie. Let me explain I know a lie is a lie. But I don’t like when people know the truth and don’t want to tell you the truth to make themselves look better. If you have no intention on doing something then don’t. But don’t lie about it. Don’t talk about someone and then go out of your way to make it seem like your for them. The moral of the story is that if you feel the need to lie don’t! If you can’t stop lying then don’t get mad when someone calls you out on it. Lies hurt and not help other people.

Lane:

Have you ever tried to cross into someone else’s lane while driving? What about in life? Are we so caught up in what other people are doing that we are don’t take the time to do what we are suppose to do? Have you heard the expression stay in your own lane? While we are scrolling through social media looking at everyone’s perfect life. We need to understand that no one is perfect. We are living in a world where we want to be someone else. Why? Did God not make you good enough? Do you think being someone else is really better? We need to stay in our own lane. We were all created for a reason and purpose. Your purpose is not to be jealous and envious of others. If you would take the time to work on yourself and your insecurities instead of wishing to be someone else maybe you wouldn’t be so envious. Let’s stay in our own lane and see what we can offer the world. We need more people being there true selves instead of what you want people to see. Stay in your lane.