Who’s content with their life is the question? I thought that I was but, to be honest, I’m not. There are things that I wish I had, wish I could do and wish I had more of. But if I”m being honest I wish I had a better relationship with God. It’s my fault, not his. He is always there open and ready but I’m not. Why? Because he knows everything about me. He knows my thoughts, fears, and dreams. But to be honest, what does it look like having a relationship with God? I pray, read my devotionals, read my bible, and listen to sermons. But does that mean that I have a relationship with God? Am I being lazy in this area of my life? I would have to say yes. Seek and ye shall find. Knock and the door will be open to you. Sometimes I feel like I’m drowning when it comes to having a relationship with God. What does he truly expect from me? I pray to connect and have a relationship with him. I pray for others more than I pray for myself. But what am I missing here? I feel like I”m not content because I’m missing this relationship with God. I feel like I”m not content because I”m not truly seeking him as I should. What am I missing? What am I doing wrong?
Conversations on finding and loving who I am 
A while back, I was in bible study and this exact thing came up. We were all reading a book called The God Chasers by Tommy Tenney, in which he talks about seeking God’s face (presence) and not his hand (all the things he does for us). It was very enlightening and during our little bible study we were all forced to re-evaluate our relationship with him. My question was: Why do I love God? Was it because I was taught to love him? Or the things he’s done for me?? Or even if that’s what a good christian is supposed to do? I laid all of that on the altar and prayed for clarity.
A relationship is a two way street, if God is doing all the work then he’s in it by himself. If God asked you to do for another or even for him, would you be able to deliver? My answer in truth, no. I can’t. My emotions get in the way but I can honestly say that he has and is meeting me where I am on the path with my relationship with him, which is nowhere near the end and not very far from the beginning….been a christian since I was a teenager and there is still more for me to learn about him and from him.
I hope my nonsense makes at least some sense. Relatonships are hard things, they require a lot of attention, care, and honesty. I think the fact that you are asking the question is a step in the right direction and a sign that he’s put it on your heart. I hope you find the answers you are looking for. – Ty
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This is what I needed. I’m definitely going to have to find that book. So many good questions that I need to find the answers for. I’ve been a Christian since I was 21. I grew up in church but my relationship was not the best with God. I would get close then push away. This has been on my heart and it’s time. Thank you for the advice I really appreciate it.
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Glad I could help and I truly hope you find the answers you seek.
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