I’m struggling:

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I’ve had a lot on my mind lately, but one thing that keeps coming back to my mind is me being a wife. I struggle with this a lot because well my husband isn’t like me. To be honest he is nowhere like me or any other guy that I have dated. We are truly complete opposites. I use to be the type of person who could hold a grudge for years but I have changed in that area, but one area I haven’t changed in well a couple of areas is forgiveness and just able to hear him out when we get into it. Why can’t I do these things? To be honest, I’m not sure, maybe my heart hardens and I don’t want to at the time. I can go weeks and months not talking to someone and I know that’s not healthy at all. But last week my husband asked me where is my grace? Maybe I don’t extend grace to him? Do I extend grace to anyone? I’m not sure, to be honest. For some reason I’m struggling being a wife, maybe it’s not being a wife I’m struggling with maybe it’s deeper I’m not sure. I know that I care about my husband and love him, but to be honest, sometimes I can walk away from him and not want to come back. That’s mean, right? I don’t know what I’m dealing with but I need to do a lot of work on myself that is for sure. It’s not easy dealing with the truth but it’s necessary.

10 thoughts on “I’m struggling:

  1. I don’t know much about your situation but my experience is that after 25 years of marriage my husband and I finally got some marriage counselling. We should have done it years ago. Would have saved us a lot of hurt and possibly made it easier to rectify our difficulties. Might be worth considering? I think it’s better done sooner rather than later. Prevention is better than cure and all that. 💗

    Liked by 1 person

  2. tell me please have you a thing in the past that is still eating at you,you cannot share.that is eating your past present and future,i ask you this because if you dont talk to anybody for months you are with drawn into yourself ,have you forgiven yourself yet

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Wow! So much here! Good that you recognize someone dynamics are really unhealthy. They destroy you as much as others. As a Christian counselor, I’d encourage you to seek counseling individually and as a couple. It is a mark of strength and growth, not weakness. It is a declaration that you are ready to change and not stay in the same rut.

    Liked by 1 person

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