Marriage:

I made a list of what I wanted in a man, but never really thought much about it after I made the list. The funny thing is that when I met my husband he had pretty much everything that I wanted on my list. I used to be in long term relationships which were fine with me because the idea and thought of marriage scared me, to be honest. But one day we had that talk about marriage and I told him that I was gonna get married when I’m 80. He said 80 why? I was like so I can have someone to die with. But in reality, I didn’t want to argue and have all the drama that comes with marriage. The truth in the matter is I wasn’t sure how marriage was supposed to go. I didn’t see my parent’s marriage and the marriages that I did see well some of the couples were just not happy in their marriage. I didn’t want to be that person who’s married just to be married. I didn’t want to be that person who was stuck in an unhappy marriage and would stay this way until I died. I ask one lady why she was still in her marriage if she was so unhappy and she said that they didn’t believe in divorce. I was scared when my husband asked me to marry him. I knew what divorce looked like on the other side. I didn’t want that, but I also didn’t want to be without my husband. I step out on faith and said yes. We have been married 9 years now and to say it’s easy is an understatement. Marriage is like a full-time job. But I love it. I don’t always get it right. There are days when we argue that I do go to bed angry. But I’m learning and my husband is very patient with me. I don’t always get it right, but I know that I will.