Daddy issues: Part 1

Photo by Ylanite Koppens on

I have Daddy issues. Yes, I said Daddy issues. As a girl, I never knew what it was like to be daddy’s little girl. To have a close relationship with my dad. My relationship with my dad was built on disappointments and let downs. My dad would lie to me and say that he was coming to see me or get me but it never happens. I remember growing up and only spent two summers with my dad. I believe I was like 4 or 5 and the other when I was 16. But none of those times can I say that I was super close to my dad. Our relationship is weird. He didn’t come to anything that was going on in my life. I was sick and in the hospital my dad wasn’t there. I had three children and my dad was never there. He didn’t see me graduate. He didn’t come to my wedding. I’ve always had this longing for a relationship that I only seem to want to have with my dad. It’s very awkward, to be honest. My parents were married and my dad got another woman pregnant. That hurt my mom and I grew up reaping the effects of a bad marriage. My dad really to me didn’t seem to have any interest in me and it hurt me to the core. And now growing up it’s still the same. Our conversations are very short and it seems like strangers who are trying to force something. There have been times where I have told him how I felt and even wrote him a letter about it. To have the love of a dad would have been great growing up. But I never got to experience that. It was and still is hurtful.

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