Why did I let you abuse me Part 2:

I got pregnant by my boyfriend and oh how stupid I felt. Just because someone says that they love you don’t make it true. Love doesn’t hurt you or disrespect you. Love makes sure your okay. I had never seen a man put his hands on a woman before, so this was all new to me. The best thing that came out of me being pregnant is that he never put his hand on me during that time. Did he still disrespect me? You bet he did. Why was I allowing a man to do this to me? Why wasn’t I trying to get out of this relationship? But I thought that I could change him. Funny huh, I could change someone??? I doubt that. But after my son was born things did change for the better, for a while. Then one day I made a surprise visit to where he was staying and caught him cheating on me with another female. My heart dropped. Let me explain something, I wasn’t in love with my boyfriend but I had feelings for him. We had a kid, that had to mean something right? Wrong that meant nothing to him. I’m still in high school my senior year to be exact and he has some female on the side. I just didn’t get it. Well, that day that I caught him with another female we fought. It was bad ya’ll and when I started to leave he pushed me down the front stairs. Talk about humiliation. That was a very low point for me at the time. I graduated from high school and started working. But our problems didn’t end, and neither did his cheating. I was chocked out, beat up and all because I wanted my son to have his dad around. I didn’t grow up with my dad and I knew how it felt to not have him in my life. Stupid for thinking that way I know now, but at the time it made perfect sense to me.
Now my dumb self took it a step further, we moved out of town with him to his hometown. Why did I do that to myself? I truly wasn’t thinking at the time. We moved there and nothing changed except the state. I was at my lowest that was for sure. I never understood why someone would put their hands on you and claim that they loved you and cared about you. Well, I had enough when we got into it about him taking my car. His friends were there and he was trying to be tough and he hit me so hard that I flew back on the bed. Oh by the way my son was in my arms. I drew the line there. I called my mom to come to help me drive back home. He had never put his hands on me with my son around. Listen I want people to understand it’s not okay or cool to allow someone to put their hands on you. That is in no shape, form or fashion okay. They will say they won’t do it again. That’s a lie. Don’t allow someone to have that much power over you. Know your worth. I know it’s easier said than done because this is my past. But this experience has allowed me to understand someone’s character who is abusive. The best thing that I did for my son and myself was to leave that relationship and never look back.

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